Don't ever underestimate the power of words.
With out a moments notice, some one can cause your heart to fall to your toes.
And your toes are certainly not where your heart should be.
My advice?
Don't let anyone hold your heart. Because their words will put it in your toes. Every time.


-B

Toes

Your heart doesn't belong in your toes.

So I'm standing here wondering what i can do, to give it someplace to go.

And my thoughts don't belong on the floor, 

But they  lie here in front of me where I can see them, but I would rather they walk out the door. 

A voice belongs in the air, 

where it can float and drift and be heard,

Yet how can I talk when the words say wouldn't be heard with care? 

And these hand just don't know where to go,

 so they pull at my hair and hit my pillows, because my fingers plus yours are all I know. 

-B

The moon

I thought the night was warm

And the air too 

Because the sun was hot

And the moon too

I think the moon is hot. 

Just because it glows.

And I could look it up. 

But what's the trouble in ruining an imagination? 

Exactly. So don't correct me if I'm wrong. 

Because my moon is a burning one. 

That's why it glows. 

And really I just keep writing this nonsense to hold back an extreme string of profanities wanting to fight back against the never fair never ending process we are going through. 

Life. 

I like to see life in everything. 

That's the way I see God. 

God is everything around me. In every pebble, grain, mountain, sea. 

My God is at least.

And I'm not asking you to believe, or even consider my idea of God. 

Because its my mind.

And it would be completely absurd to force it on you. 

Force. 

I feel like forcing anything or anyone in any way is a crime. 

You can only set a strong example and wish the best for them. 

Because no matter how successful your force seems to have turned out..

It is always a different story on the inside. 

In your mind. And your heart. 

And the forcer has accomplished nothing truly. 

Except the destruction of your relationship. 

And who's loss is it now. 

But I really do think the moon is burning. 

And I wouldn't quite mind If it burned out. 

And took me with it. 

Soul

I think I have a soul.
Sometimes I question it. What's the purpose of my soul?
Of any?
Is it to bond with a "soul-mate"? If so, how does your soul-shell find your soul's mate and it's accompanying body. And why are some souls so lucky as to have their mate placed so close in life. The same state, town, school, street.
"High school sweethearts".
Or is it just that those are the lazy souls that have given up from the very beginning. And are settling.
But settled souls seem  perfectly happy to me. So maybe thats not it.
Maybe a soul has multiple bonds. So many that there is indeed a good chance that you  will find at least one, or maybe two, more.
And what of divorce?
Do soul's bonds break? Maybe the soul just settled first. Then opened it's eyes got off it's laztas s and decided to search again for one of the "soul-mates".
But what of our minds? Your mind is of your body, isn't it? Or maybe  just the brain is of the body, and mind is of the soul. And that is where the two meet.
I think that's it.
But how come my mind won't show my brain all that it has experienced before being tied to this soul-shell? Did it even experience anything before? Is it choosing to keep all that can be known from my brain? Is my mind secretive and selfish..
Or is it that there wasn't anything before? And my sould was made as was my body. And together we have spent all the time that either has ever experienced.
And if so, that there was no before, is there also not an after? I will fade out in mind as I die in brain. And there will be nothing infinite of the sort? And if there is not a before, followed by no after, what is in between?  Is a soul a real thing? This is my brain begging my mind to elaborate for me. But maybe my brain and my mind are just the same thing.
But maybe this is my soul, my mind, fooling my brain and body. So that I don't guess all of eternity's secrets.
But maybe there are none to guess anyway.


-B

This One is for You.

The world is full of good people,
Yet the good are not always the best,
With rocky pasts, always coming in lasts,
Some more tortured than the rest.

My town is full of good people,
Carbon copied, perfect, all the same,
All dreams aside, their desires they hide,
To stray is to receive the black sheep blame.

You my friend, are good people,
Always made it on your own,
Troubled child, forever wild,
But in loneliness you're not alone.

-B

Sumer 2013 Bucket list

Buy a pair of mandals.
Get better at henna designs
Go on at least one extra fancy date
See GATSBY
Marry GATSBY.... I wish
Go to Oregon
Camping/ road trip.
Zion's
North Carolina
 trip to San Francisco with Erika to tour the art institute
Early college in the art program at weber state
Build up portfolio
Get more piercings
Become a long boarding bad ass
Meet new people
Climb a lot more
Change my hair again
Have fun during my last summer at home!!!

Do you Justice

Reminiscing,
Before the head games.
When words came easy and there were no pains.
When the warm summer air carried the smell of cut grass.
And I think of your eyes, because they are green.
Sometimes I listen to that old Taylor Swift song.
The one that says your name,
Like it's written just for you, because her words are spot-on.

And I wish I could do you justice like that.

-B