Diet Soda

Change.
It is inevitable.
But oh, how we resent it.
Change.
A constant.
But so unpredictable, so frustrating. How?
Change.
Hiking the switch-backs of life. Never ending.
Or so it seems.
Change.
Because one day you'll look back.
Wonder when you started drinking diet soda.
Or when you stopped drinking it at all.
Change.
Pathways changed.
Pathways crossed.
And somewhere along the way-
You Changed.

-B.

Feelings

Chills.
Waves crash on iron-shore.
Pushing, splashing the new feelings.
Up. Up and over until the iron-shore is submerged.
I am submerged. Drowning.
Soaked.
The iron-shore, worn down. Now sand.
Sharp, dark edges washed away.
My guard is down.
Feelings- water colors, brush the beach with foam.
Current.
The push and pull- high and low tide. Feelings.
Good feelings.              Finally.
Like warm sun on the waters, that smile. Those eyes.
Beautiful.
A sight to make the storms forgotten.
Almost.
The crash of waves on iron-shore will always leave a mark.
A mark on the surface, and one in the heart.
But...
It's the warm sun on the waters.
The sun that makes the sand hot and the shade cool.
It's that sun that gives me hope.
And for that.... I thank you.

- For C.

- B.

No Longer

You're a passing moment, almost gone.
The sweet old feeling that was always wrong.
A lesson of patience not rewarded.
A moment of hurt forever recorded.
Your words almost forgotten for good.
It's the actions I'll have trouble with, I never understood.
I think you're the kind that gets pleasure from my pain.
A person who likes to fill my clouded mind with pouring rain.
I'm ready for the sun to come out, something I long to see.
It's been far too long, life is still patiently waiting on me
I don't want you to hurt, It's just that I'm just done.
Putting up with your games, you're no longer My One.

What I look Like

This is what I look like asking, what I look like praying,
Begging even, that you only listen to what I'm saying.

But listen with your heart, not your ears but your mind,
My lips don't have the right words, or anything close to the kind.

This is what I look like aching, This is what I look like dying,
I've tried to be strong, but the happy girl you see has been lying.

Let's let out the truth, And let the world know,
This is what I look like loving you, and please don't let go.

1. skinny dip
2. compose my own song on violin
3. hike at least 5 times a week
4. volunteer at the homeless shelter
5. get a henna tattoo
6. get a job
7. kiss under the 4th fireworks
8. go camping frequently
9. get super TAN
10. fall back in love
11. go chalking
12. go to complex at least twice
13. don't wear make up
14. teach bruno to talk
15. go boating
16. finish painting the mural on my wall and start more on my other walls
17.  long board every week
18. rock climb in city of rocks

-well thats about it (:

A beautiful Thing

Movement, it is a beautiful thing, change is something we all need.
Difference, it is a beautiful thing, the past makes you bleed.

Thought, it is a beautiful thing, the things I thought made me realize.
Emotion, it is a beautiful thing, there are things I love-I despise.

Heart Beat, it is a beautiful thing, purpose pulses under my palm.
Knowledge, it is a beautiful thing, learning that I can go on.

My Trials, they are beautiful things, teaching me to grow.
Change, it is a beautiful thing, I'm not the person you used to know.

Scars

Trying, struggling to be perfect or at least to be right.
You fake it till you make it, but you can't win this worthless fight.

At times you think you're prevailing, leaving this feeling of gloom.
Two steps forward, three crumbling back and it seems that your thoughts don't have room.

Room to escape your flooding mind, filled with thoughts to paint your arms in red.
Logic in your head fights hate in the heart, so torn you could pass for dead.

But this is a secret, please hold it tightly, I can't trust myself while I'm healing so I'll trust you.
Help me grow from this habit and kiss the scars that cover the veins that are healing too.